Literally, a lot to dislike in overused, misused phrases

Friday, August 6, 2021, Vol. 45, No. 32

6040 Jocelyn Hollow Rd

People say “a lot” a lot. When they say “a lot,” they use it to describe a large quantity such as “a lot of baloney,” which should be a lot of bologna. But since they have made it to this point in misspeaking, they might as well butcher bologna.

A lot is actually a parcel of real estate, sometimes known as land. A lot is a place upon which a house might be set, or set, if the case may be. Said house might have been improved. Perhaps a wall was moved or a door added.

Here is what people say when they describe their houses to their Realtors: “There used to be a sink here, but we moved it over there, and then there was a closet here. But we made it an office. We didn’t need an architect because my husband can do things.”

Then they say: “Like I said, there used to be a sink here, but we moved it over there, and then there was a closet here. But we made it an office. We didn’t need an architect because my husband can do things.”

Sometimes they say “like I said” three or four times. It was heard the first time and had no relevance and became less relevant each time it was repeated. People like to say, “like I said.” Perhaps repetition is their soul of wit.

Another favorite is “does that make sense?” Why the heck would they have said it if it made no sense?

“We replaced the HVAC last year. Does that make sense?” Either the listener is a blithering idiot or has issues with chronology. Of course, it makes sense. You are not speaking in an unintelligible language. I have the ability discern words in a series. Don’t ask me if that makes sense.

Like I said, never ask me if anything makes sense again. If you need to ask, the answer is “no.” If what you said makes no sense, either the listener of the speaker is a moron. My money is on the speaker.

Then there exists the duo of “to Be honest with you” and “to tell the truth,” which can be substituted at will. “To tell the truth, I am not sure how old the roof is since I was not born in 1973. We moved in later and, to be honest with you, I can’t remember how old it is.

Like I said, ‘I was not here then.’ Does that make sense?”

Also, here in the South, it’s usually pronounced “Does that make since?”

And then there is “literally,” which has become the universal meaningless word. “We literally replaced the water heater in 2017 or 2018. One of those. Does that make since?”

Literally does not mean approximately or perhaps. It means “exactly” literally. Today, it means nothing. It means the speaker might not want to delve into the “like I said” zone. It means they want to add accent to their thought – or not.

Someone wrote that any statement that begins with “I literally” is not redeemable. Either the speaker did or did not. No need to quantify with “literally.”

“It is what is it is.” Could we be more profound. A house being bought in “as-is” condition is what it is. Here’s a question: “What is what it isn’t?” Answer: nothing.

Everything is what is it is. Some things aren’t what they used to be, but they are what they are now. They aren’t what they can be. They simply are.

Sale of the Week

Like I said, this is the sale of the week. I’m going to be honest with you, this is literally the sale of the week. Does that make since?

Here is why it is the sale of the week. It is the sale of the week because the listing agent was Brandon Knox. Like I said, he is literally one of the top producers in the real estate market.

He honestly stated in the remarks section of the MLS listing that the house is situated on 2.53 acres. He is an honest man, that Brandon Knox, but then he put in the middle of the listing that the lot size is 2.42 acres. That literally does not make sense.

To be honest with you, I think Brandon had a survey more accurate than the Metro tax record autofill gizmo. That literally is only something a Realtor could understand. Does that make sense? Like I said, Brandon was honest with us, but Metro blew it, not they meant to blow it.

Luckily, the team of Happy Fulk and Tara McGuire, who have their licenses in the Parks garage, were there to save the day.

Knox listed the property, however large it is, for $1.75 million. The happy duo from Parks realized he was not being honest with the market and sold the house for $2.2 million, $450,000 more than list price. And, to be honest with you, the buyer was happy, just like Fulk, to get it.

The real estate market is like an ATM. It always rolls out the right amount. Literally.

Richard Courtney is a licensed real estate broker with Fridrich and Clark Realty, LLC and can be reached at [email protected].