It has come to my attention that, like a certain freshman congressman from these parts, I might have inadvertently left some mistaken impressions among the public and readers about my education, work background and general life history.

Consider this an effort to set the record straight.

For starters, saying (as I have many times) that I went to college at Oxford was not meant to indicate that I am a graduate of Oxford University, in Oxford, England.

I am instead a graduate of a different university, IN Oxford – Mississippi – Ole Miss. Which is, arguably, even more prestigious than that other one, which doesn’t even have a proper football team.

Along those lines, it has perhaps been a slight exaggeration to have occasionally suggested that I played football “for Ole Miss.” For clarity, what I should have said is that I played intramural flag football “AT Ole Miss,” for the Buelah Hubbard Honkers.

And any references to my time in a fraternity while in college should probably note that I depledged Delta Psi as a freshman, and thus did not have extensive “firsthand experience” of Greek life on campus. Though I do still remember the secret pledge handshake and password, which I will never reveal. Again.

There also are some minor inaccuracies in accounts, possibly given by me, of the course of study I engaged in while at Oxford. (Excuse me: IN Oxford.)

Since reviewing my college transcript, it has become clear to me that the classes I had remembered as being Quantum Physics, Aerospace Engineering and Clinical Microbiology were, in fact, Archery & Badminton, Pottery and Intro to Folk Art.

As a result of this clarification, I will make an effort to no longer refer to myself – even incidentally – as a physicist, an engineer or an immunologist. Or, as has sometimes been the case, all three.

In terms of work experience, I should probably also discontinue use of the self-description “presidential scholar and biographer,” though I did interview Sargent Shriver one-on-one during his 1976 bid for the Democratic presidential nomination. (A bid that was rather quickly unsuccessful.) And shook hands with Gerald Ford on the stump.

Likewise, “political adviser” and “campaign strategist” might similarly fall under the broad category of “embellishment.” While it is true I have been offering advice and strategies to politicians for going on half a century, there is no recorded instance of any of those politicians actually asking for that advice. Or taking it.

Ditto, “marriage and relationship counselor.” Despite my various dealings in interpersonal entanglements – both legally recognized and informal – and my willingness to share the wisdom collected from those dealings, it seems to have been uniformly rejected over the years, even by friends who should have listened. (You know who you are.)

When it comes to my experience in business, you might recall I have, at times, referred to a highly successful landscaping operation I formed and incorporated in association with a fellow from my hometown. It was in fact a lawn-mowing pact with my neighbor Ken Hase that disintegrated after we completed one job for $1.25. We were 12.

Perhaps the biggest misconception, and one I am certainly happy to be able to clarify at this time, is my law enforcement expertise in the field of international drug trafficking.

What I have meant to say is that I was at one time certified as a Junior Forest Ranger with the United States Department of Agriculture, under the supervision of Smokey Bear. My badge – the main reason I applied – was, unfortunately, never delivered. But I’m sure there’s government paperwork somewhere.

It goes without saying, of course, that I oppose international drug trafficking, so it’s clear that I have had a law endorsement role. I am now amending my previous claims and saying that.

I am pleased to voluntarily set the record straight regarding any confusion on all these matters, which resulted from nothing more than my efforts to condense some parts of my résumé for the purpose of brevity. Like that certain freshman congressman.

Joe Rogers is a former writer for The Tennessean and editor for The New York Times. He is retired and living in Nashville.